It may seem a bit ironic and even insensitive, but in speaking and doing therapy with many people, some, but not all have arrived at a place where they see the blessings they have gotten from having undergone traumatic experiences. How can this be? One of the many directions in dealing with traumatic events is to heal from them by reducing the impact they have on our present experiences of life. Also, traumatic events are things that all of us have experienced. Many of us at times are not able to function normally when traumatic memories are triggered.
The classical story from the Bible is the story of Joseph, who was sold into slavery by his brothers. For this youngest and beloved son of Jacob, this had to have been very traumatic. Yet, later in his life he understands that it was all part of God’s plan to save his family from hunger, a great blessing! It turns out to not only been a blessing for him, but for his father and brothers who were also traumatized by his being sold.
Many years ago, a client was diagnosed with an illness that caused great fatigue and fainting. This hardworking, mother, and businesswoman’s life changed from being an energetic person to getting divorced, losing her business, and her health. All seemed very dark, until she was asked to find the blessing in her experience. When I spoke to her a few weeks later she was very joyfully tearful as she revealed to me that since her diagnoses, she met and married a wonderful understanding man, had several stepchildren, and was able to be a stay at home. “All I ever wanted to do since childhood was to be a stay-at-home mom, bake cookies, and take care of a family. I could not have done this without my illness.” I discharged her after a couple of sessions yet think of her often.
When I was eighteen, I was in a truck accident that resulted in losing an eye, and a closed head injury. It was very painful and traumatic. Yet with workman’s compensation money I was able to go to college. There I met Mary Jo. We have been wonderfully married for fifty-three years, have three children, five grandchildren, and wonderful sons-in-law and a wonderful daughter-in-law. I have many cherished and close friends. I also have four college degrees, am a Lay Ecclesial Minister, and two wonderful careers, one in teaching and one in counseling. Could all of this have happened without that truck accident? Probably, but it’s part of the story.
So, I ask you, “What are the blessings in the traumas you have experienced?” If you cannot think of any, just ask the Holy Spirit to show you. You may be amazed. It is a great mystery!
“May the Lord bless and keep you. May he let his face shine upon you, be gracious to you and give you his peace.”
