Every December, Sen. Rand Paul releases his annual Festivus Report, a nod to the fictional holiday made famous by Seinfeld. The tradition includes an “airing of grievances,” and for taxpayers, there is no shortage of them.
I just got the opportunity to read the report, and as usual, I am appalled at the ridiculous items our Congress feels the need to fund.
Paul’s report catalogs examples of federal spending that range from eyebrow-raising to downright absurd. While Washington often dismisses these expenditures as trivial, they reflect a deeper problem: a federal government that spends other people’s money with little concern for value, accountability, or common sense.
Among the most infamous examples are research grants that seem detached from real-world needs. Taxpayer dollars have been used to study shrimp running on treadmills, whether monkeys prefer gambling to guaranteed rewards, and how stress affects Japanese quail. These projects often cost hundreds of thousands — sometimes millions — of dollars. While scientific research has its place, it is fair to ask why Americans struggling with grocery bills are funding animal experiments with no clear public benefit.
Foreign spending is another frequent offender. Festivus reports have highlighted U.S. tax dollars paying for drag shows in Ecuador, a transsexual comic book in Peru, and gender studies programs in Pakistan. In other cases, money has been spent to promote tourism in foreign countries — essentially asking American taxpayers to subsidize advertising campaigns so people can vacation somewhere else.
Closer to home, federal agencies have managed to waste staggering sums on buildings no one uses. Paul has pointed to millions spent on empty or underutilized office space, including federal buildings that sit mostly vacant while agencies continue paying rent and maintenance. In one instance, a multimillion-dollar parking garage funded by taxpayers saw little to no use after completion.
The military is not immune either. The Department of Defense has repeatedly failed financial audits, unable to account for trillions of dollars in assets. Festivus reports have cited examples such as spare parts being purchased at wildly inflated prices and equipment left unused or abandoned. While service members do their jobs with discipline and sacrifice, the bureaucracy above them often operates without basic financial controls.
Then there are the grants that simply defy explanation. Taxpayers have funded projects studying romantic habits of fish, building museums that never opened, and developing apps that were never used. Once the money is spent, few in Washington seem interested in whether the project succeeded — or even existed.
Defenders of this spending argue that these line items make up a small percentage of the federal budget. That argument misses the point. Waste is not measured only in dollars, but in trust. When citizens see their money used this way, confidence in government erodes.
The Festivus Report resonates because it exposes a pattern: programs that never end, oversight that rarely bites, and a political culture that treats taxpayer dollars as monopoly money. Meanwhile, Americans are told that deficits no longer matter, that higher taxes are unavoidable, and that fiscal restraint is unrealistic.
Before asking taxpayers for more, Washington should prove it can responsibly manage what it already takes. That means fewer shrimp on treadmills, fewer overseas vanity projects, and fewer empty buildings collecting dust on the public dime.
Until then, the airing of grievances will continue — and rightly so.
