Why do we take care of a disabled or elderly friend, spouse, or family member? The answer is simple, because we love them. In my work as a psychologist, I have never been more impressed than when hearing the stories of parents, adult children, and spouses who have dedicated their lives to caring for others. Even in my personal life I have witnessed caregiving. When my oldest sister had a stroke that left her paralyzed on one side of her body, it was truly amazing how her husband took care of her. They even traveled together to Florida on several occasions. He helped her up and down stairs, took her to rest area bathrooms, restaurants, helped with person care and patiently listened as he slurred her words. Why, because he loved her. She lived nearly twenty years after her stroke, and he was with her all the way. He once told me that he looked forward to dying because he would be able to sing the Ave Maria to Mary and be with my sister for eternity. For him, it couldn’t get better.
Caregiving comes in many shapes. Caring for a handicapped son or daughter, an elderly parent, a spouse with dementia or other life long illness, a sibling with a head injury, someone whose hands and eyes don’t coordinate, and those who need wheelchairs and walkers or can’t drive anymore and need a ride. Again, why do we care for them? We love them.
Being a caregiver means that we have to take care of ourselves, too. Sometimes we get so involved in caring for the one we love that we overlook our own need for staying physically and mentally healthy. A person who is burnt-out, exhausted, and not taking care of themselves, just can’t be the care giver they want to be,
There is a workshop, Powerful Tools for Caregivers, that is starting on May 19 for six weeks at 6:00 pm on Tuesday evenings. The hope of the presenters is that you will learn to care for yourself, better manage stress, deal with negative feelings and thoughts that may happen, network with other caregivers and professional providers. This is a virtual workshop via Zoom. To register, you can call Tri-County Office on Aging at 517-887-1465 or email histedc@tcoa.org. The workshop is free.
The person we love cares for us too. Being a care giver can be the most rewarding experience of a lifetime. People who are caregivers tell me they would not have changed it for the world. That is my experience, too.
“May the Lord bless and keep you. May He let His face shine upon you, be gracious to you and give you His peace,”
