Of all the conditions or diseases, one might encounter, Alzheimer’s/dementia is in my opinion the worst.
Many of us know a mother, father or a close relative that has suffered from this disease that saps almost all memory from a person. In my case it was my mother.
The mother I remember was full of life. She loved to entertain, be involved in many charitable causes, while at the same time taking care of her five children. She was always on the go and full of vim and vigor.
That is until Alzheimer’s paid a visit- a visitor that became permanent decimating my mother’s ability to even recall the most important people and things in her life. Of course, this transformation didn’t occur overnight. It took years for her to get to the final stage.
In the beginning my siblings and I had few clues she was in an advanced state. When I infrequently visited my parents in The Villages I discerned that my mother couldn’t remember certain people or places by name, but heck I felt we all suffered in that respect when we advanced in age. Little did I know my father was essentially her caregiver doing all the household chores and taking care of her the best he could.
When he died suddenly of a stroke, we quickly learned that she could not function by herself. We placed her in a memory care facility back in Michigan, close to family members. I was an hour and a half’s drive away, but dutifully visited her every Sunday.
Unfortunately, I witnessed her deterioration week after week. It went from not remembering her spouse of 50 plus years to wondering what a stranger (me) was doing in her room. Ironically, she was of good health. She walked the halls of the center and rarely had medical issues until the very end.
My siblings, as well as I were very distraught. This diabolical change in my mother made us feel so sorry for her. No human should suffer memory loss like she had. We learned, however, over time, there was nothing we could do. We laughed, then cried, then laughed again. But mostly we were just sad. We wanted our mother back, but we eventually realized it wasn’t going to be.
Alzheimer’s/dementia has replaced cancer and heart disease as the number killer of older adults. Actually, it doesn’t kill, it simply debilitates one until they are susceptible to another disease that actually causes ill health.
I’m told researchers are on a fast track to find a cure, but so far, cures have been evasive. There are plenty of products out there that claim they can slow the progress, but one can only guess whether they work or not.
Since my mother’s death, I have encountered scores of individuals who have experienced the same emotional pain and and trauma as I, thanks to Alzheimers/dementia. One in every ten people end up with Alzheimers and if you reach the age of 85, your chances multiply to one in three.
I hope we can find the cure sooner than later. Robbing one of their memory is simply diabolical, and neither should the patient or their family have to experience it.
